It’s an honor to hold the ashes of our dead.
Some of my brother James’ ashes are in a box on the top of a bookcase in my house. The ashes of a full-grown human being are heavy, enough to fill a half-gallon jug.
His daughters and I released some of his ashes on the beach at Tybee Island two months after his death, on a cold day when the wind was sweeping up sand. His ashes mingled with the sand and the salt wind.
We have vague plans for the ashes in the box, maybe to take them to the mountains he loved and scatter some there. I’ve already scattered some in my garden. James, like me, had an affinity for the plant world.
This poem was originally published in Atticus Review , along with the image above.
Bananas love ashes in summer.
Time to spread some in the yard.
The fireplace grate is empty.
It’s easy to put things off. Even fire.
No one was diligent like my brother,
who sifted broken shells for hours
looking for shark’s teeth. Once, he held
his hand out with a shattered sand dollar
to show me little bones inside.
His other hand flew up and fluttered—
he said the bones were white doves, the peace
that passes understanding. He believed
in omens and Jesus and that one thing
could also be another. Time to feed
plants? At the first thunderclap.
The grate is empty, the urn is full.
His ashes scatter under the banana trees.
Rain dissolves fine particles, but not
the shards that passed on through.